Clients and their customers both need something from you.
It’s one of the most important and irreplaceable things in a writer. And if you don’t have it, you’ll likely join the ranks of the less than mediocre writers of our time.
I’m speaking of… rapport.
“But I don’t even understand how this is important! And how do we tell if we have rapport or not?”
I’ll tell you in a minute, but first, let’s consider an experience we’ve all had.
I was driving down the road and my phone rang. I reached over and I kind of glanced down at it, trying to keep my hand on the wheel.
Eyes forward, and it said, “Dream Girl.” I hit the button and it came up on my car-phone speakers, “Hey Margie! How are you?” It didn’t even ring twice before I answered.
A few hours later and I’m driving down the road still. Again my phone rings. I glance down at it. Looked at who it is and it’s got this Florida number.
A Florida number!
Now over the past few weeks I’ve been getting this phone call from all different parts of the country telling me that I’ve been named in a lawsuit and I should call immediately and settle up… I mean, clearly a scam.
So my response is, “Reject Call,” and add that to the long list of banned numbers in my life.
Now what’s the difference in my response?
That telemarketer had next to negative rapport with me, but my wife Margie, The Official Dream Girl, has a MASSIVE amount of rapport in my life.
Rapport is when you are in a position where you have weight in somebody’s life.
That weight causes you to connect with them.
Your clients need to know that their writer can be professional, on time, relate with their clients, understand the industry, and sooo much more. If they see that in you, your weight in their life increases… and so does your rapport.
The customers you write to need to feel like you understand their situation in life, that you get their struggles or identify with their passions. If they see that in you, your weight in their life increases… and so does your rapport.
Are You Similar?
As you can see, the first thing that adds to your rapport is your similarity to them. When you first meet somebody, you shake their hands, say, “Hey Bob. How ya doing? Nice to meet you.” Then what do we immediately start doing?
We start a conversation with them. “Hey, where are you from? What kind of work do you do? How did you get involved in that work?” etc.
What do you think we’re doing when we start asking those kind of questions?
I’ll tell you exactly what we’re doing. We’re trying to find similarities! We’re trying to find the connective tissue that will start to create a relationship.
Do They Like You?
The second thing that adds to your rapport is that they like you.
When we like somebody, we have rapport with them. When we like them, it’s usually because they fill a need in our life. They help us to feel special. To feel unique. To feel like we are loved.
When somebody else makes us feel that way, we feel connected to them… so we give them some amount of rapport.
Do They Want To BE Like You?
Here’s the third thing to know about rapport:
You see somebody that has a certain level of skills, or ability, or social standing, or physique, or financial standing, or whatever it is… and you WANT that.
You want to be similar to them because you see that what they have looks like it’s making them happy, making them feel loved, making them feel special and unique.
You see they have these results, and it’s because of something they do, or something they have. And so you want to be like them.
And because you want this, you give them some amount of rapport… hoping that in doing so, they will lead you along, or maybe that some of their greatness, status, income, or whatever it is will rub off on you.
If you can become like them, then you can have that same experience of feeling loved, feeling special, feeling unique and different. Fundamental things we seek as human beings.
So, What Do You Do About It…
You now know that three things contribute to your rapport with a client, as well as with their customers: having similarities, them liking something about you, and them wanting to be like you.
The cool thing about rapport is that it brings “compliance”.
That means when somebody identifies with you or they like you or they want to be like you, they are more willing to do what you want.
So here’s what you do next.
- Who is your client? What do you have in common with them?
- Who is the customer you are writing to? How can they identify with the product or service you’re writing about?
Let us know in the comments below what you find. Then use your answers to build your rapport with your clients and customers, and hear the feet figuratively pounding to your door.